mon night went to chinatown there eat..
and is like my last time eating the 羊肉汤..
not so nice already..
but will wanna try the fish head but is super warn there larh!
walk around there?
and sis bought hotdog from the angmoh again!
wahlao..
and i was so stupid told mum that if i sold 10 books she will have to buy sth for me..
then she say i earn money buy for myself..
told dad he say..
you earn money still need me buy..
then i was like saying i dont even need to earn money de lol!
i bu que money..
sure got ppl sponser me de..
then he say what if he dont give..
like i got no more lobang for money?
home after that..

tues sure was super slack..
after assembly had briefing on the labrador thingy..
then went there to wei wen zi.
i just hate there can!!!!
then blah blah blah..
ohh and i had my worst gastric for this year..
super pain!!!
then debrief..
then kieran accompany me to eat...
and i saw jasmine from trybe..
chat then to maths training..
and i slept!
is boring de lo..

wed had dare to dream programme..
i love it lots..
cause is organise by trybe..
i know im simply biased..
i wanted to go yusof with them then thurs got school..
saw nicholas! dy! jasmin! albert! steven junior! raffy! vege!
ehh and many more larhh.
then stayed back for maths..
left at 3pm..
and i at last watched finish destiny love..
and can only wait for 1 ep each week!
ROAR!!

today!
had inline skating..
and there is this guy1 who teaches us how to wears the gears..
then guy2 help me find shoes..
then girl3 help me wear school..
guy4 teach me how to skate..
guy5 look at how we skate..
guy6 who seem to be the incharge..
guy7 the world champ..
think i didnt miss any bahh..
guy1 voice was simply to soft to be heard by me!
then i keep troubling guy2 saying the shoe not nice to wear..
hai him to find another shoe for me..
girl3 worst..
so hard to help ppl wear shoe yet she need to help me..
guy4 keep suan'ing me..
and his name i never get it right..
spelling is so weird larh..
but nice to be with if know him longer..
i know de..
guy5 i know nothing..
guy6 he asked us to keep the shoe but then very fierce..
so i was like saying i got say i dont want put mehh?
why so fierce..
and he apologise..
so should be someone nice too..
the guy that suichyen say is handsome de lo!
guy7 was fanstantic in skating..
thats all barhh?
went for geometry thingy..
super funny at the end..
cause ms phang gave me 2 mins only to solve 2 Q..
then must do myself..
so chengjiang and lifang help me..
then alot of stupid stuff larh..

saw my old post think is about time to post before i lose the interest in blogging AGAIN..

15may..
thursday...
is a marking day yet i nida go back to school for the guide training..
so at the bustop waiting for the bus..
saw boonkeat and his friends..
so at least got ppl to pei mi..
but then not long ltr he left and we saw zhou lai shi..
then in the bus while alighting then i knew mr amran was in the same bus as mi..
idiot..
i dont even know..
cause is like i saw weiliang..
stupid..
the training was real boring no fun at all..
regreted giving the money...
then went home when i suppose to go out.
the next day got school marhh..
so if go out sure damn sian de..
or rather pekcek about wasting my time..

16may..
friday..
got confidence building..
absailing was the first and i struggle for mins..
ermm?
15?
then the instructor manage to release me and din need to do!
is like he said if i cant do absailign i can forget about zip line and rock climbing...
so did i did the both??
read on!!
zip line was next..
it was the !@#!^&)^&#^&#* instructor who said about if you are happy about raining not having to do any of them then BLAHBLAHBLAH..
come on like everyone wants to play..
zip line was nothing after playing it..
just a little bouncy at the starting..
rockclimbing..
nothing much..
just got leg cramp..
there were like 5 position to be..
being the dont know what larhh..
must pull the rope de..
dam freaking easy and i did well for that..
went to taekwondo in the night..
and mac..
so talk alot yeah..
them saw my hp..
chun was like saying u should ask ur parent to give you $800 for ur own expenses while $200 for buying of hp..
LOL

17may..
sat..
went out for dinner only!!
ouhh cause i went to school for the labrodor park trail..
while was super hot!!!
warm rather..
and many ants and spider..
very big but i din saw.
cause we were climbing the stairs for a long time and i got fed up so climb on looking at the front rather then those ugly trees or whatsoever..
quite high so i was rather scare?
for nothing.
got probia marhh..
then went to je 1st then novena..
hell..
hp went dead!!
cause i was like lazy to charge then listen to radio etc etc..
so bo bat!!
then walk to novena sq??
dont know the name for a walk then face2?
the whole mall..
and back to novena sq for a walk..
and i walk every corner of it..
and i found adam khoo learning centre..
happy of course..
mingles too..
went to the office..
while walking saw jasmin xinyi and zhiyin..
was supposed to meet them but no battery so decided to meet at office when i so coincidence saw them..
and jasmin thought i was kidnapped cause i didnt ans her call..
when i din even know..
so i got 12 book 3 calender and __ flyers..
lazy to count..
and ppl!
ATTENTION!!
LOW KAY HWA BOOKS.
AT..
$12.80 FOR 1
$21.80 FOR 2(SAVE $3.80)
$30.80 FOR 3(SAVE $7.60)
$39.80 FOR 4(SAVE $11.40)

then to novena sq for lunch at ljs..
then homed..
uncle poon came to fix my com when the connect got sth wrong!!
then to east coast to eat seafood lol..
then home
not that boring larhh..
cause in the day i was super tired waking at the park..

18may
sunday..
went to malaysia cause sis wanted to..
and was like unhappy for not visiting my grandma for @$#%^months..
so next week.
went to tebrau city..
caught ironman..
not that nice lol..
cause i think is sth lyk transformer..
watch le i wun want to watch it again..
ate macaa express..
yummy!
then shop etc..
and my phone cost RM$1888+..
so can attract attention there..
haha..
not a gd thing..
ouhh and at last i manage to get into the cargo lane where lorries etc.
drive thru..
is like my first time..
and is gigantic..
reached home at 130am..
watching the wu zhong xian dont know what prog..
where by you laugh you get hit on the butt..
and slpt..

today..
woke up and went down to collect food for dad..
then posting liao..

now again feel so stupid!
cried when heard the 世上只有妈妈好..
and i remember today is 1 year for grandpapa anniversary..
haix!!!
i forgotten about it totally!!!
i remember that i remembered few day ago..
yeah i know..
few day ago marhh..
then winnie at grandmama house..
poof!!!!
i wanna see prettaye winnie!
and i wanna talk to her now!!!
yes!!!
now..
mummy talking to winnie's mum!!!
my sunway lagoon!!!
then i cant express to mummy that im despo to talk to winnie!!
ohh i miss her so!

see i got moodswing!
awhile sad!
while happaye!!
awhile crazaye!
&&& it seem like my 1st aunt is hao lian'in about the ang moh cert she got..
hmpf
-.-
suck man..
tmr got school!!!
though is marking day..
stupid one advocate..
got wat guide trainin!!!
think i xi han meh!!!
fk larh..
and now im angraye..
a hungry man is an angry man!!!
but im not hungry!!!
but despo for chocochipchoco..
=DDDD
&&& i heard that my san yi got her new passport!!!
that mean she can come and visit me!!!
quick quick quick..
and i give you a kiss..
so long norhh..
that time got personal matter so cant come and scared cannot pass..
now can le..
so what you waiting for??
and i wanna bring winnie to every part of singapore..
bugis street!!
whatever she wants i buy for her..
lixuan if u c this dont jealous..
u tell me what you want larhh.
i buy for you too..
=DD
i very good de..
and i saw your 3rd post..
i love you too worhh..
=DD
go swensen go swensen!!!
quick quick quick!
ohh and i wanna be of legal age to go clubbing..
so can go with jacelyn!
then soon can go with winnie!!
heeheehee

shall post about the recent days next time barhh..
wanna express my thoughts for now..
though it wouldnt be written wonderfully..

12 more days..
just 12 more days to 26 may..
i nv like it for the first time.
u know?!
can you understand?!
1st time!!
i hate it when im remised of what happen on that day..
i din told him how much i love him.
how precious he was to me..
and he was gone within a blink of an eye?
the guy that i trust the most..
he din comfort me..
leaving me in anger..
having to bear the burden that im part of being the cause of him dying..
thoguh i know that it is not because of me..
but i've been trying to think of reasons to say that its me!!
its me who cause him to die!!
trying to make myself miserable?!
going to 1 year but i still cant stop blaming myself for not telling him..
now that he is gone..
i regreted..
so what?!
who bothers?!
i feel so hurt..
is like being stabbed on the back by someone whom you love dearly, trusted the most and give you a sense of security.
all i can say is..
what am i supposed to do?!
i feeling lyk slashing my wrist..
but i know that those who cares and loves me would be hurt..
including bestie/s..
it would prove that i dont love myself!!
which i cant do..
i must love myself.

我的心很痛
我该怎么办
你能帮我把洞给补起来吗
太痛了

我哭了
你能相信吗
我自己都不敢何况是你
我真的哭泣了
如果现在有一个温软的肩膀就好了

i know some of you might be thinking..
1 year still got feeling de meh?
then let me tell me..
yeah there is..
why??
cause when he haven pass away..
i been thinking about the future..
& many more things..
and is like SUDDENLY!
boom!
dashed!
gone..
everything gone already!
is really within a blink of an eye!
heartache..

im like so tired now..
think i gona fall asleep soon..
talk about few days back..
hmm?
friday!9th may then..
after school i went back home..
and it took me 1 hour to take a nap..
so slacked and prepared to go out..
at 5pm..
choi came to fetch me..
then went to market place for dinner..
to be frank that was the worst place i ever been for dinner.
small cockroaches could be found too!!
isn't it ridiculous???
yeah i know..
some of you must be thinking..
oh dear..
is like everywhere also got larhh?!
why is liqing making a big fuss?!
but pls lorhh..
the place i been to eat is like no cockroaches de can??
so after that..
dont go what building??
at city hall de..
then waste time..
at about 630pm..
did cleansing of face..
followed by skin analysis..
and is like my T zone area is oily with enlarged poles..
+++blackheads on the nose..
the most common face..
+ dehydrated on the cheeks with refined pole..
&&& dehydrated on the neck??
dont know larhh.
then mask using 3 different types..
gona die man..
and then eyebrow twisting and then eye lash tin-tin..
i love it..
so now my eye lashes are blue..
not light nor baby blue..
those mascara..
yeah that kind..
then make-up i think?
i got messed up with the procedures.
stupid is day make up.
i prefer night can..
thick eye liner..
yeah so wait for choi then homed..
&&& millie didnt call me?
i meant after we hang down the phone she said she will call me again?

sarturday 10th may..
sis was enthu about going to malaysia and when it was so jammed..
that dashed all her hopes..
so we went to jalan kayu for roti prati..
is a must go place..
is super nice..
and theres still a 'long' hist of it..
but of course you must know is which one larhh..
cause is like many shops selling roti prata there are snatching its business using its fame..
&&& the otah that sells there too are delicious..
we can compared it using the non spicy as my house nearby sells are super duper hard and got tanxing..
whereas jalan kayu ones are soft..
and smell wonderful..
really nice larhh..
then to sengkang shopping mall..
am not afraid to say..
i never been there before..
quite a nice place..
then went to blk 177 for dinner..
more like supper to me though it was 9+ 10..

sunday 11th may..
HAPPY MOTHER DAY!!
hope all the mother on earth had a wonderful day..
but then nonetheless there are still mothers who are weeping..
will not continue..
back to topic..
so yesterday i studies like shit..
for home econ..
then fetched grandma went to east coast eat..
wanted to eat at the place where my father many many years back went to..
but closed down..
so ate at the restaurant at the venue..
it was a new chapter to my family's story as what my daddy had said..
so it took us 1hour and 20mins?
to eat 2 dishes only..
is like the captain does not know how to do business..
if is me?
is different..
&&&i was real frustrated..
though i was jio by qinjiang to go to bukit batok town and meet up with the rest..
i didnt..
cause i dont know where it was..
then 11am+ he msged me saying that they were at blk 111..
but i got sth cropped at the very last min..
so,rejected..
and lucky i rejected it..
cause i need to study for home econ..
which took me more than 5 hours..
or rather about 6 hours..
so after eaten that 2 dishes we walk off and went to tion there..
near my grandma house and ate at the liang dont know what..
the food served are much much more faster can.
but i wasnt famished at that time..
cause i drank alot of tea to 'prevent' getting gastric..
so after that the cust service was good..
we left and you know the workers say happy mother day and bye..
and tha lady boss son stood up and say goodbye to us + happy mother day?
i was so jealous..
that guy skin colour was so fair!!
i also want!
i love sun tanning..
but am afraid of the sun..
and UV LIGHT!!!
meanwhile i want to be fair too!!
ridiculous!!

today..
came home and used com till now..
home econ was rather easy..

im like so damn dead?
not my usual self anymore?
我该怎么做？
我真的真的不知道发生了什么事！！！
我总觉得是我害死的你！
但我知道不是我还你死的!
我还活在二零零七年·。。
当我一记得爸爸说他有可能会活时。。
我已经在幻想了！！
可是！可是！
他死了！
我所要法发生的事都不能实现了！
what am i going to do now?
tell me!!
宝贝。。
为什么在我最需要你时。。
你却不在呢？
我很怕那种感觉会不见！
我真的是怕..
i did think of commiting suicide.
but after what today exam had wrote..
i 左右为难。。